Hobbies of a 15 Month Old

• Hoarding food in unknown places, mischeviously eating

"I wasn't eating any grapes.  I promise."

•  Practicing invisibility behind curtains, telecommunicating with outside cats

• Shamelessly waving and flirting with everyone he sees

•  Plotting how he can permanently move outside

• Giggling with all felines

•  Fetching the newspaper every morning like it's his job

Date Night: The Wall

Jesse and I had our first date night in over 15 months.  That's right, with the exception of attending a funeral, Jesse and I haven't spent one single evening apart from Jackson in his entire life.  While I treasure our family time, it was surprisingly nice to get out of the house just the two of us. 

Jesse won tickets through a local radio station to see Roger Waters: The Wall.  This is the concert he's "waited for his whole life".  After many years of trying, and much to Jesse's dismay, I have yet to find an appreciation for Pink Floyd.  I'm not a fan of all the bizarre sound effects and never-ending instrumental segments.  Regardless, Jesse assured me that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity and I had no reason not to go.

Jesse's mom arrived at six.  We knew it would be easier for Jackson to sleep if he had his usual routine, so I was relieved that she suggested coming to our house.  Jesse and I headed off to Cosmos for some drinks before the concert.  (Okay, I had half a Blue Moon before deciding I really shouldn't drink while taking medication.)  For the first time in a long time, I felt my age.  I love living in an urban area, and it was fun to just go uptown and have a drink before a concert.

Words cannot describe the concert.  It was more like a Broadway show.  It was very theatrical and abstract, with unexpectedly little music.  The whole thing was over the top with lights, pyro, cartoon characters, video clips, planes crashing, giant inflatables, impressive projections, etc.  I had a hard time deciphering what audio was live versus recorded.  To say that my senses were on overload is quite an understatement.  Thankfully, Jesse helped clarify some of the scenes as I genuinely didn't know what was supposed to be represented with the various visuals.  The show ended rather abruptly with the literal wall being torn down.  I still don't know what my opinion is on the whole thing, but it was certainly a spectacle! 

Happy 30th Birthday (x3)

Our family had the pleasure of celebrating as my brother-in-law, sister, and family friend all turned 30 this week! 

The first birthday celebration took place at a local minor league baseball game.  Jesse's brother, Jason, enjoyed Thirsty Thursday night with the team mascot, his family, and close friends.   

His wife, Chrissy, had rented a VIP box, which provided indoor air-conditioned space for eating and cooling off, as well as the box seats outside to watch the game.  Jackson spent a good portion of time eating indoors with his PaPa or watching the game in his MiMi's arms.

The weather was surprisingly mild, though the game was impatiently slow.  Jesse and I stayed 2.5 hours, and the game was still only in the 5th inning!  The evening was very laid-back and fun.  It appears that the birthday boy had a good time, too.

Unfortunately, I don't have photographic proof of any other 30th birthday festivities. 

The following evening many friends and family members gathered for a surprise birthday party for my sister and her friend.  There were copious amounts of desserts and friends gathered to honor them.  As far as I know, it actually remained a surprise to both of them.

Once the clock struck midnight, I made my traditional birthday phone call for my sister.  A few hours later I entered into an 18 hour panic attack from hell, while the rest of my family went camping.  I did try to make up for my lack of birthday celebrating with a surprise cake for my sister when she returned.  It was chocolate with mocha buttercream.

Hooray for a new decade and all the memories it will bring for these friends and family members!

26th Birthday in Pictures

While my birthday was on Tuesday, we began celebrating with a birthday breakfast at Ikea on Monday.  My sisters, nieces, and nephews accompanied Jesse, Jackson, and I.  We enjoyed a free breakfast before browsing through Ikea. 

For my actual birthday, our family took advantage of our Discovery Place membership.  Jackson has mastered walking since the last time we visited, which made the trip a lot more fun.  He enjoyed standing on the stools and peering through the aquarium glass.

 We also enjoyed the interactive exhibits,

 as well as the water table play area.

We concluded my birthday festivities with a spaghetti dinner with the whole family.  My mother-in-law brought lots of outdoor toys including frisbees, water balloons, and water guns.  The littlest ones found the most entertainment playing in the bucket,

while the bigger kids took over the backyard and ran themselves ragged.

Dessert included a delicious brown sugar pound cake, courtesy of my mother-in-law.  

And there you have it, another good birthday!

Pinterest Party

A friend of mine hosted a Pinterest party this afternoon.  The goal was to pre-select a craft or recipe and bring all the ingredients or materials to create your project.  I had originally planned on going camping with my sister, but that didn't work out in light of yesterday's anxiety levels and current medication.  At the last minute, I decided to attend the party.  If I had planned on going, I would have found a great craft to use my scrapbooking paper.  Instead, I found this easy recipe for s'mores dip.  I had everything in my pantry except marshmallow fluff.  After a quick trip to Food Lion, Jackson and I were on our way.  The dip was quick and tasty.

http://www.whatmegansmaking.com/2012/06/smores-dip.html

The highlight of the gathering was playing with all the baby boys.  We make some cute kids!   The newest addition to our Irwin family is a precious 2 week old girl.  I love that Jackson can play with his friends while I play with mine!

Life With Anxiety Disorder

I have suffered, and I do mean s-u-f-f-e-r-e-d, with anxiety disorder since high school.  I've spent years learning how to cope with long-term counseling sessions and short term medications.  Unfortunately, my symptoms have been escalating rapidly since May. 

For me, anxiety disorder:

• makes the most mundane events seem terrifying. 
• blows everything out of proportion and makes me truly panic.
• makes my heart RACE and body tremble with sweat.
• creates unbearable nausea. 
• causes me to wake in the middle of the night in fear. 
• leaves me speechless and only able to grunt.
• can result in blacking out and waking up on the bathroom floor. 
• can send me to the bathroom with intense stomach pains. 
• makes me afraid to go to sleep. 
• makes me petrified to travel. 
• can make me nervous about eating. 
• gives me a weak stomach. 
• wakes me in the middle of the night with panic.
• makes me guilty that I can't control it.
• makes me feel shameful and the need to hide how bad things really are.
• makes me frustrated when the people closest to me don't understand.
• makes me furious when people say "it's all in your head" or think I'm overreacting. 

For the record, I saw the doctor this week and am taking medication again.  Prayers it kicks in quickly and effectively.

Update: My sisters and husband coaxed me into going to Urgent Care after a particularly severe attack.  (FYI, if you want to get seen in Urgent Care quickly, lay down in the middle of the floor.)  I am now taking Clonazepam around the clock for the next week in addition to Zoloft. 

Table Manners (or Lack Thereof)

We have our work cut out for us trying to raise a respectful boy at the dinner table!  When Jackson wants food, he screams wildly.  He screams in an assertive, demanding kind of way.  He also throws his food and sippy cup when he is finished.  He casually drops it over the side of the high chair tray both at home and in restaurants.  Jesse and I just keep firmly saying "no" and picking it up, but he's behaved like this for months.  I don't know if there's something else we should be doing or if he'll just eventually learn. 

One of the things we're working on is using a spoon and fork.  Jack is very purposeful and works hard at getting the food on the spoon or fork.  Silverware can become an unintentional catapult, especially when given a bowl and spoon.  He tends to use one hand to pick the food up, then switch hands to actually put the food in his mouth.  His fine motor skills are improving, though.