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Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Confessions

Even though I haven't pumped in two weeks, I shut my door and put the "Do not disturb" sign up during lunch every day because I want to eat in peace.  (We have duty-free lunch so I am not neglecting my kids or anything.)

I genuinely thought going on antidepressants would magically make me feel happy and successful at work. 

I teach at a school of reform and this is the last year to make growth before it is taken over by the state.  I secretly fantasize about the school being taken over in hopes that I can find another position.  (I would never want my kids to fail though.)

I sleep so hard that I don't even hear Jackson fuss much during the night anymore.  Jesse wakes up to feed him every night and I rarely even notice.

I daily question my decision to go back to work and get jealous that Jesse doesn't have the stress of grading, lesson plans, observations, and never ending data paperwork.

I bring home a whopping $1600 a month after insurance is deducted from my paycheck. 

After my first observation, my principal said "We hired you because of your expertise; we're just waiting to see it."

1 comment:

  1. So, what you're saying is, you have a reason to be depressed/anxious and a pill isn't going to take away the circumstances...HUGS and PRAYERS.

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