1. continue as a stay at home mom all day while Jesse works
2. stay home during the day and find part time work at night or on weekends
2. return to teaching and put the children in daycare
4. return to teaching and find a nanny
Here are the pros and cons for each scenario:
1. continue as a stay at home mom all day while Jesse works
Pros |
Cons |
-I won’t miss any milestones with my kids.
I get to love and kiss on them, teach them, take them anywhere,
etc. Even though this is only advantage, it is so important to me and could outweigh all the disadvantages. |
--I will spend another year without health insurance, which makes me
nervous. --We will seriously struggle financially (I contributed over $10,000 this year from paid maternity leave and performance bonuses based on last year’s test results. That money is no longer available.) --We would be unable to afford preschool for Jackson, which means he would miss out on structured learning/peer socialization. |
2. stay home during the day and find part time work at night or on weekends
Pros |
Cons |
-I won’t miss any milestones with my kids.
I get to love and kiss on them, teach them, take them anywhere,
etc. -With part time work, I could still watch my children grow but I would also have an opportunity to interact with adults and have a break from kids. --Ideally, I would find fulfillment using my experience or expertise. |
--Jesse and I would basically be single, working parents. We chose this route Jackson’s first year
and it was challenging to never spend time together as a family. It was also stressful on our marriage. --I will spend another year without health insurance, which makes me nervous. --Part time jobs aren’t always the easiest to find. Ideally I would tutor kids on the side or sell cakes, but I don’t know if that could provide enough income. I would really hate to work retail or fast food. That’s not why I went to school for six years. --We would likely be unable to afford preschool for Jackson, which means he would miss out on structured learning/peer socialization. |
3. return to teaching and put the children in daycare
Pros |
Cons |
--I could return to a career that I love and feel successful doing. --I would have health insurance. --Both Jesse and I would contribute equally. --Jackson thrives in school settings. He would benefit greatly from the predictable routines, education, and peer socialization. --The babies would have attention from other peers and adults. I suspect their language and development would explode in a daycare setting. (They would begin daycare at 13 months old.) |
--Most, if not all, of my paycheck would go to daycare. --We wouldn’t be able to cloth diaper. Buying disposable diapers adds a large expense that we do not currently have. --I would only spend a few hours a day with my own children. Those hours would likely be with tired, cranky children. --It worked out really well last year for me to drop Jackson off and Jesse to pick him up. We don’t have that option anymore since whoever does drop off and pick up will have to drive the van. The hassle of getting four kids fed, dressed, and out the door on time would definitely be an additional stress each morning. |
4. return to teaching and find a nanny
Pros |
Cons |
--I could return to a career that I love and feel successful doing. --I would have health insurance. --Both Jesse and I would contribute equally. --There would be the convenience of leaving the house and coming home to my kids without having to lug everyone in and out of carseats. --Jesse and I would make the rules and the schedule. We decide on cloth diapers, when to eat, how many naps to take, etc. --It should be cheaper than daycare. |
--Most of my paycheck would go to a nanny. --It makes me nervous to rely on one person. If she’s late, Jesse or I are late. If she’s sick, Jesse or I stay home. (That wouldn’t be the case at a daycare.) --I would only spend a few hours a day with my own children. Those hours would likely be with tired, cranky children. --It would be a difficult search with lots of interviews. Nobody is going to be me, so I would probably hate everyone at first. --There’s a good chance I would resent someone for knowing my own children better than I do. --Jackson wouldn’t have the socialization and education that I would like for him to have. There’s no way we could afford a nanny AND preschool. --There are lots of complicating logistics if I expect the nanny to take all four kids out of the house (which I definitely do). For exp: We would need to provide a van and/or four carseats. If we traded cars while she was at work, we would have to added onto each other’s insurance. Would we take out taxes or pay for any kind of healthcare? |
Prayers and opinions are welcomed!
Always praying.....and it's a very, very stressful, tough decision. Of course I vote for one of you being home at least one more year and hope that Medicaid work out for you.
ReplyDeleteOption five: Find part time work via a preschool?MMO without cutting into your family time and allowing the kids to go with you.
ReplyDeleteWould I not have to pay for the four kids to be enrolled? That seems to defeat the purpose. I'll look into it, though.
DeleteNot necessarily; you would most certainly get a discount. At our school; all teacher's kids are free (obviously, not the norm everywhere).
ReplyDeleteIt's definitely a tough decision. Insurance is so important! I am covered by my husband, thankfully. I have twins and work PRN in healthcare. I work 1-3 days/evenings a week...only 4.5 hour shifts. It's healthcare so it pays well and I feel like I get the best of both worlds. I hope you find what works best!
ReplyDelete