I don't claim to have a large family, but I have more kids than any of my friends. Having four children is significantly different than having one or two kids. Here are things I've learned about having a large family, between being a mother of four and the youngest of five.
- Your monthly grocery shopping budget is almost as much as your mortgage.
- There is no such thing as a "24-hour bug" in your house. When the first victim succumbs to the plague, you expect a 4-day minimum for the virus to make its rounds through your family.
- You've spent the better part of a decade diapering children.
- You rejoiced the day double-seated shopping carts arrived at your local grocery store.
- While out in public together, you are frequently asked, "Are they all yours?"
- Receiving your tax refund is better than Christmas.
- If your van were to ever break down, it would take multiple vehicles to transport your family.
- Hand-me-downs are the only clothes your younger children have ever worn.
- You have a membership to Sam's or Costco and regularly buy items in bulk.
- The only time your family has ever gone out to eat is when it was a Kids Eat Free night.
- Your family exceeds the maximum occupancy in a hotel room.
- When at the zoo or park, you quickly do a head-count to make sure you have everyone.
- Scheduling parent-teacher conferences gives you a migraine.
- Your kitchen table takes up the entire dining room.
- Trying to take a family picture is like herding cats.
- You have to buy more than one "family size" box of food to feed your family.
- Your entryway is littered with shoes. So. Many. Shoes.
- You make school lunches in an assembly line.
- You have a stockpile of birthday and Christmas gifts that you've purchased on clearance throughout the year.
- You have called your child by their siblings' names as often as you've called them by their own name.
- You are never early to anything. You feel accomplished if you are on time.
- Your definition of personal space is being able to sit down without someone in your lap.
- At any given time you have one load of laundry in the washer, one in the dryer, and one in a basket waiting to be folded.
- You have a small panic attack every time you consider how you'll be able to pay for car insurance and college tuition for everyone.
- You have learned to embrace the noise and mess that fills your home.
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