Things That Make Me Want to Scream

1. The fact that it's been 18 years since my dad died. Eighteen years is a long time and I'm angry he's not been a part of it!

2. Our external hard drive crashed. It had monthly folders filled with tens of thousands of photos dating back from 2006. I gave it to a knowledgeable computer guy and even used a data recovery program. Nothing can be found. Nothing! Y'all know how obsessed I am with photos!

3. I spent dozens of hours working on a five page teaching application with TWENTY short essay questions. It took me over a week to complete it. I emailed the director with the attachment, only to just now realize the copy was BLANK. Not only do I look like an idiot, I now have to start completely over.

4. Jesse called me on the way home from work yesterday to ask if I needed anything from the store. I was in a sappy, pissy mood (see #1) and requested fudge rounds. He did not come home with fudge rounds or even anything edible.

5. The trio and I all have a bad cold. I've literally spent nearly every hour with at least one child cuddled next to me or crying. Not having any personal or emotional space is wearisome.

6. I had to go to the grocery store yesterday to buy butter. I was cooking a friend dinner and pound cake last night and I apparently didn't buy butter. I walked all four kids through the parking lot, then down the grocery store aisle to get butter. Jackson (yes, Jackson, not one of the toddlers!) threw a fit at check out because I wouldn't let him buy some junk food. He threw the butter across the store where customers were bagging their groceries. I had to carry him out. Then Maddie started crying because it had started raining and she hates getting wet, so I had to pick her up, too. Then I couldn't hold James or Amelia's hand in the parking lot. It was a total shit show.

Each of these things occurred in the last 36 hours. It is taking everything in me to not start screaming bloody murder and throwing things!