Saturday, July 7, 2012

Life With Anxiety Disorder

I have suffered, and I do mean s-u-f-f-e-r-e-d, with anxiety disorder since high school.  I've spent years learning how to cope with long-term counseling sessions and short term medications.  Unfortunately, my symptoms have been escalating rapidly since May. 

For me, anxiety disorder:
  • makes the most mundane events seem terrifying. 
  • blows everything out of proportion and makes me truly panic.
  • makes my heart RACE and body tremble with sweat.
  • creates unbearable nausea. 
  • causes me to wake in the middle of the night in fear. 
  • leaves me speechless and only able to grunt.
  • can result in blacking out and waking up on the bathroom floor. 
  • can send me to the bathroom with intense stomach pains. 
  • makes me afraid to go to sleep. 
  • makes me petrified to travel. 
  • can make me nervous about eating. 
  • gives me a weak stomach. 
  • wakes me in the middle of the night with panic.
  • makes me guilty that I can't control it.
  • makes me feel shameful and the need to hide how bad things really are.
  • makes me frustrated when the people closest to me don't understand.
  • makes me furious when people say "it's all in your head" or think I'm overreacting. 
For the record, I saw the doctor this week and am taking medication again.  Prayers it kicks in quickly and effectively.

Update: My sisters and husband coaxed me into going to Urgent Care after a particularly severe attack.  (FYI, if you want to get seen in Urgent Care quickly, lay down in the middle of the floor.)  I am now taking Clonazepam around the clock for the next week in addition to Zoloft. 

1 comment:

  1. Already praying. It's not in your head. I'm sorry.

    Anxiety blows.

    HUGS & prayers.