Another sleepless night. Lots of spitting up. Weird sounds that Jackson makes and I don’t know what they mean yet. Marathon nursing sessions continue. Enough said!
Side note: I have been religiously applying lanolin to my nipples and am already noticing a great improvement.
Today was Jackson’s first doctor’s visit. I already feel overwhelmed about traveling, but of course I can’t become a hermit just because I have a child. His appointment was at 11 a.m. Luckily he was hungry and I was able to feed him right before we left so I wouldn’t have to worry about nursing in public. As our first official outing, we loaded the diaper bag and awkwardly put him in his car seat. Last week I could be upstairs on the computer; Jesse would set the alarm; and I would be in the car in less than 80 seconds. Those days are clearly gone. I’m not sure why we made an appointment because we weren’t called back there until 11:15. Jackson was a silent angel in the waiting room and every person that passed by “oooed” and “ahhhed” at him. There is so much pride in showing off my baby. Jesse had me cracking up filling out Jackson’s medical history. Basically the whole form was not applicable. Jesse also kept saying, “Who is the Billy Ruben they keep looking for?” referring to the bilirubin test for jaundice.
The actual doctor’s visit was horrifying. Jackson had a total diaper blowout while the nurse was preparing to weigh him. When we changed his diaper Jackson peed ALL over the wall and floor. I was literally mopping up the floor with paper towels when the doctor came in. Jackson weighs 8 lbs, 7 oz. This is down 8 oz from birth and the same as his discharge weight. Since my milk just came in yesterday the doctor wasn’t at all concerned. Jack just needs to be back up to his birth weight by the two week check up on April 27. The doctor did comment that he looked slightly yellow and ordered another bilirubin test. The nurse came back to prick his heel. I have never heard a child scream like he did! It was so hard to literally hold my infant down because he was kicking his feet together so violently and smearing blood everywhere. It took the nurse five minutes to collect the tiny vial full of blood. For as much pride I got in showing off my sweet, calm child, I had every bit as much nerves and shame carrying my SCREAMING infant through the waiting office and parking lot. People don’t smile at that. (I know it’s irrational to think that a newborn who just had a needle in his foot and blood massaged out of him wouldn’t be screaming—there again comes that fear of people judging me or my child.)
It was after 1 p.m. and Jesse, Jackson, and I were all starving. We swung by the Jack in the Box drive through and headed home. Jackson was screaming bloody murder by the time we got home so I fed him and he passed out for four hours. I haven’t mastered breastfeeding with one hand yet so I am too clumsy to eat, read, or do much of anything else besides feed my child. I am getting used to soggy cereal and cold food.
It was nice not to have company today. It was the first day of just the three of us hanging out. We still don’t have a routine, but we are managing fine. I don’t mind the daytime but I am beginning to question how I will do this on my own in a few weeks when Jesse returns to work. I am in total awe of single mothers. No way could I do that.
Time for dinner and bed.
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| 4 Hour Nap After Scream Fest at Doctor's Office |
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